Six months ago today, we met
Heidi for the very first time in that Civil Affairs office in Nanning,
China. We caught a quick glimpse of her
as she came in the office with her orphanage staff—she was wearing a long
sleeve dress, tights, tennis shoes, winter coat and had a purse slung across
her chest. She showed no emotion on her
face while Olivia was beyond excited at that point and could not wait to meet
her new little sister.
I cannot imagine the fear that
ran through her little body as I picked her up and even greater anxiety she
must have felt as we left the Civil Affairs office with her. It was heart wrenching to watch her grieve
over the next few days with us—she would be find one minute and then completely
fall apart crying hysterically standing up throwing her head down on the bed
not wanting to be touched or consoled.
Little by little we all adjusted
and found our new normal. Heidi had
several doctor appointments once we got home.
She was seen at the International Adoption Clinic where she was tested
for all sorts of diseases, had her titers drawn to confirm which immunizations
she had already received, met with an occupational therapist and family
therapist there as well. The doctor we
saw at the International Adoption Clinic decided to do a CT scan since her
medical records from China indicated that they had done one on her earlier and
we weren’t quite sure why. Something
came back abnormal on the scan and we were referred to a neurologist at
Children’s Hospital. Fortunately, the neurologist
said she looks great and we will go back later this year just for a follow
up.
There were some challenging weeks
when we first got home. For one, Heidi
was super attached to me but not so much to Brian. I could not walk out of the room and leave
her with Brian without her completely breaking down. We also noticed that she was very compliant,
which would normally be great (who doesn’t want a well behaved child that never
disobeys or gets into trouble?), but we were told that this could actually be a
sign of previous abuse. If we scold her
for something or tell her no in a firm voice, she immediately tears up, covers
her face with her hands and sobs. Over
the past couple of months she has begun to tell us “no” sometimes—I have been
told this is good thing…. :)
Heidi is learning new things every
day. She can speak in short sentences
and has mastered the art of telling on Olivia using her own made up sign
language if necessary to make sure we know exactly what happened. :) Some things stay the same--Heidi still has to have a "pursey" on every time before we walk out of the house and she is still not a big fan of the dog--while other things change like she always pats the space beside her on her bed at night for daddy to lie down with her.
Heidi adores Olivia! Every morning when we drop Olivia off at
school, Heidi says “I love you Olivia, have a good day” and when we pick Olivia
up from school in the afternoons Heidi usually will ask Olivia how her day
was. Some days this really annoys Olivia
though!
Sometimes when I go into their
room to wake Heidi up from her nap, I watch her sleep and wonder what the first
2 ½ years of her life was really like.
Did she have friends? Did she get
much one-on-one attention? Did she have
to take care of herself even at a young age?
Why didn’t anyone choose to adopt her?
If we hadn’t adopted her would she still be there waiting on a family
all because she had a scary diagnosis that did not turn out to be accurate at
all?
We are so blessed that Heidi is
part of our family because now that we have her here with us we cannot imagine
life without her. She is my sweet baby
Hei and my heart is full.
